I’m reading Build the Life You Want – written by Arthur C. Brooks and Oprah (!) for the new year. I picked it up from the library on a day where my daughter and I swore off our devices, just to see how addicted we were to our screens.
Last year was a time of many justifications. I didn’t complete nor achieve what I wanted: I told myself that I was happy being just an at home dad, that progressing my career wasn’t important, that maintaining friendships weren’t a thing I wanted to spend effort on. But overall, the year was a net negative in terms of happiness.
Happiness isn’t a destination, but a state. The book is a quick read, but it provides a helpful set of action items to do and explains the pseudo-science behind it’s advice. Happiness comprises of three essentials that should be in balance:
- Enjoyment: pleasure, communion and consciousness. This is more than just pleasure or feeling good.
- Satisfaction: the feeling that comes from accomplishing a goal through work and sacrifice. This is more than elusive joy.
- Purpose: having a sense of meaning and direction that leads to hope and inner peace.
It’s a good read. For example, I’m journaling again because it’s a good way to keep a database of my emotions and memories. I’d like to log my progress better this year.
Oprah summarizes the book with one of her sayings, “Feel the feel and take the wheel.” One of my goals this year is to be more conscious of how I’m feeling to circumstances, and seeing how I can manage and control my reactions to those things.
I have a lot of goals left, but starting with my inner foundation is a start to making progress.